My boyfriend and I got in a fight at a party and I'm embarrassed my friends knew and I'm still sad.?
Topic: How to write a cheque in trust
July 16, 2019 / By Gracie Question:
My boyfriend and I have been together about a year now. I'm 28 and he is 26. We live together and have two dogs. He is by far the nicest person I have ever met and we get along really well. We have only been in a fight twice. Once was before we were "official" and once this past weekend. Our first fight was a result of me learning that while we were talking and not official yet (he was away finishing a last semester at college) I discovered he tried perusing other girls. Once he graduated I found out and was super sad, but we weren't official so I forgave him. We've put it past us because we've been amazing ever since and he's gained my trust in many ways. Obviously over a year a lot has happened from moving in together, many great laughs and moments shared, to him already telling me when he wants to marry me, and he has taken me to meet his really great family out of state several times.
Flash forward to this past weekend... His friend is in town from college and asked for my bf to hook him up with one of my friends. I invited some girls over, but for the first time I had a flash back of when my bf was away at college (mainly because his friend seemed like a ladies man and total douche bag). We all drank a lot. My boyfriend wasn't talking to me much throughout the night and kept talking to my really pretty friend who had barely any clothes on (mind you I was dressed to impress to, but still, I'm a girl and I can get jealous). My boyfriend was laughing with her all night and all his friends were gawking at her too. I've know the girl for years and the same type of guys always like us both so my insecurities kicked in. I never cry or get mad at my bf but I pulled him in our room and with alcohol in me started crying and asking why he was flirting with my friend. He said he couldn't believe what I was saying and walked away. About 15 minutes later we were able to be alone again and we talked more and he said he was trying to hook her up with his friend and said do you really think I would cheat on you, and reminded me that he loved me and never would. He also said I never cry and he didn't understand why I was fine earlier and being so out of character now. He said we never fight and now we seem disfunctional to everyone that knows we are. (alcohol obviously didn't help) I whipped my tears and we continued the night as if nothing had happened but my friends all knew we fought and briefly asked why. I just said I was being dramatic.
Now for several days I've been losing sleep thinking about how I'm embarrassed that everyone knew we fought when we never do. I feel like I made us seem like a couple whonhasnamton of problems when we don't. Also, I honestly trust my boyfriend and I know he loves me so much, but part of me did sense his attraction to my friend. I know nothing would happen, but how do I prevent myself from getting jealous in the future? How do I get over my embarrassment in front of my friends? (which my best friend already said that my bf and I never fight so she thought it was healthy that we did and normal). I guess I just need some words to make me feel better and help me stop losing sleep over this.
Best Answers: My boyfriend and I got in a fight at a party and I'm embarrassed my friends knew and I'm still sad.?
Devon | 8 days ago
When you are in a relationship, being jealous or insecure is completely normal. It just happens. When you really love someone you can't bear the thought of him/her with someone else. You always want it to be you. You can't really do anything to prevent jealousy. As long as you are in love with him, you'll feel a little insecure when it comes to him even talking to other girls. But keep in your mind that if you get too jealous and insecure and keep nagging all the time, asking him questions about his feelings towards other girls, getting too much doubtful can ruin your relationship. I tell you, the key to a wonderful relationship doesn't come from anywhere but within yourself. You will be able to know if he's cheating on you or not. It will reflect from his actions. The way he acts around you, the way he treats you, is he treating you in a way that is different from before, if he tells you everything or not, etc. It will show in his eyes, in his face. Love is written all over in a person's face and hidden deep in his eyes. You don't have to check on him to find out if he is still loyal to you or not. If you feel his love, trust it. Keep it in your mind and reciprocate it each day. I'm sure your boyfriend was just a bit carried away by the way he used to be in college, his other self, which his friend brought out in him.
And when it comes to fights hon, nobody can tell you better about what fighting actually leads to. You've been together for a year. You're in the starting stage of your relationship. I remember how I used to freak out after one big fight in the initial days. You're actually getting past the rosy rosy stage of the relationship, that is exactly why you feel bad about having a single fight. Slowly you'll come to know that fights are a part of relationship. The couple that doesn't fight, is surely having some problem. Every person expects something from his/her better half. And when the expectation isn't met, we fight. Through fights you come to know what your partner really wants or expects from you. Your bond will automatically strengthen. You'll feel closer to each other. And which relationship doesn't have fights? Be it in friendship or family, every relation has its own ups and downs. Do not be disheartened, it is perfectly normal. It is nothing to be embarrassed about. I'm sure when your friends will get committed to someone they will understand what makes a couple fight.
Fights will be there. What matters is how you deal with it and come out stronger. They are testing periods of your relationship. Don't freak out :)
Hope this helped! :)
👍 144 | 👎 8
Did you like the answer? My boyfriend and I got in a fight at a party and I'm embarrassed my friends knew and I'm still sad.?
Share with your friends
We found more questions related to the topic: How to write a cheque in trust
Originally Answered: Best friends doesn't last.things change after a fight and ur enemy just took ur friends away.what should i do?
Find new friends. I don't know how old you're but, sooner or later you will realize the difference between friends, and acquaintances.
True friends are the friends that you don't have to see everyday, true friends are like brothers, let me give you an example. I had a guy that I was doing business with, and he started to run away, he ran to Florida, i'm in Toronto. I called up an old friend of mine, that I haven't seen in like 5 months, for advice. Right off the bat, he told me he will come with me, and the initial plan wasn't to negotiate, initial plan could have landed him in jail, but he was willing to disappear on a day's notice, cancel his shifts at work, tell his gf goodbye which she didnt respond to too well, because that same money would've been used to promote my summer business.
True friends are the ones, if you ever got into a fight and you were fading in and out on the bed, they'll be there for you wide awake or taking turns being awake till you catch consciousness.
True friends are the ones that will still look for you, even when your pride is gone, and everything that makes you cool have gone. Like, you have the fastest car at school, and you crash and stay in bed for 5 months, true friends will visit you without request.
True friends are the ones that even if moved overseas, even if you haven't seen him/her for years, when you meet, you guys can still be comfortable to the fullest and not have to watch anything you have to say because you know the person as who he/she really is.
People use the term friends too often these days, 99.9999% of "Friends" list on facebook don't even mean friends.
yeah, true friends will not always be around so you kill your time with your 'acquaintances' and some of those may actually become one of your true friends but watch who you trust. I'm 20 now, over the past 2 years I've been through, and I've put my self through so much, and that's the lesson I learned. I guess it could be different for girls, I've seen girls sheer tears at the funeral and still be just hangout friends. i dunno
No one has the perfect relationship, it's actually normal to fight, you were drinking and your insecurities kicked in and even though he claims he wasn't interested, he was soooo flirting. His friend I am sure could have talked to her himself so even though he wouldn't flirt, the voices from the past were ringing in your head.
When you feel a bit calmer, talk to him, tell him that the fact he was paying so much attention to her and ignoring you made you feel badly, also the booze didn't help much. Don't beat yourself up, you are human, tell him if his friends need to find a girl, go get one himself and leave your friends out of it, too much drama, as for your friends, tell them you are human and you make mistakes, you were drunk and not thinking and to just let it go, I'm sure they have made similar mistakes themselves. Then just don't drink as much in the future and don't make a scene.
👍 50 | 👎 2
Want to know how to get your ex back? Change yourself. Don't worry about changing other people, worry about changing yourself. Go to https://tr.im/MFiNQ
Once you do that then you can start to worry about getting back together with your ex, other wise you will find that you are fighting about all the same things and getting no where. Do what it takes and I promise things will work out in your favor.
The funny thing is I came to the realization that I had to change a little too late. After I was kicked out and after I was about to lose the only things that truly mattered to me - her love. A funny thing happens when we truly love someone and lose them. We do what ever it takes to get them back. For me I had to drop bad habits that had caused not only our relationship to sour but practically every other relationship I had had in the past. Not only with women, but with friends, co-workers, family, you name it.
Which is why I say to you as my ex at the time said to me, the only thing you can do is change yourself. Work on yourself and improve on the person that you already are. Drop the negative things in your life that don't belong there and you will see all of your relationships start to take off to new heights.
👍 43 | 👎 -4
Hey sweetie ! Its nothing to be worried about.It happens with every couple.I know it must be embaressing that night but who dosent have fights ? Everybody does.Always remember ,where there is love,there is fight .Meaning you love him & being jealous ,thats basic human nature though if overboard could be harmful .I think what you was normal,its all right :) Everyone has their insecurities.Good Luck dear ! You will gradually forget it ,its nothing ,nothong to be ashamed about
👍 36 | 👎 -10
Originally Answered: I'm so self conscious and embarrassed around my boyfriend? Help me please?
This question is kind of personal for me since I had the exact same issue with my boyfriend. I would get short with him over every little thing, if he wouldn't text back soon after I texted him I would freak out, if there was any change in our relationship at all I would lash out and get all crazy. Most of the time, like you, indirectly because I knew I was wrong for being angry. It got so bad that I had to take up therapy for my issue and she suggested that instead of worrying all day long about things that I cant change just set aside a portion of a day that I just write all my frustrations out on paper. Whatever time I choose for however long I choose, but same time and same amount of time every night. I chose bedtime so that I don't interact with anyone after I let all my negative thoughts out and I first chose 30mins, but it's worked so well lately I have been down to 15mins. The idea is that you know that you can allow yourself a time to let all of your frustrations out and that way you wont be as tempted to take things out on your boyfriend. Honestly, by reading your post, I know exactly why he is with you though. He loves you very much! No one is perfect and if he has been with you for a year and a half I know he has seen your flaws and looked past them, just as my boyfriend was gracious enough to do for me and trust me I have done much worse to him than you have to yours. You shouldn't be self conscience around him though. If you are working on bettering yourself and he sees that, that is the greatest proof of your love for him. Because if you are willing to change for him he WILL appreciate that and in the end KNOW you did it all out of love. Don't worry about the past too much. It will just eat away at you and cause old fights to sneak back up on you. Best thing to do is just be thankful you have a man who loves you through anything. You are fortunate and I wish you both the best of luck.