Need help. My friend is overly close with his sister, ignoring his gf?
Topic: Age of the sister wives
June 16, 2019 / By Joshua Question:
Alex, my best friend, has been spending a lot of time with his sister Liz, and I mean a LOT of time. Approximately 5 or 6/8s to be precise. His girlfriend Sandra started agitating about it, asking me to help split them up so she can have him to herself more often. I've known them since we we kids and trust me when I say, they've ALWAYS been that close. I mean, they were still sharing the same bed up until a few months ago, when Alex moved out. I'll be honest, I have thought about all the time they spend together, but they seem happy. I don't want to be the douche that breaks them up because they're parents never set enough boundaries. (Trust me, they did not...) If they do have something going on there, it's not my place to get involved. And to be honest still, I don't really like Sandra. She's jealous, obnoxious, somewhat self-centered, and she clearly hates Liz. Liz is awesome! She's like the nicest person in the world, no joke! I used to have a crush on her when we were kids. I think a part of me still does. Her generosity is just so heart-warming. Personally I think if Sandra can't handle not being the center of attention, she should just walk. But I'd be lying if I said wasn't worried about them a bit. I mean I've seen the statistics for successful sibling incestuous relationships, and more than 9 times out of 10, they end very badly. Unlike with Cinderella and Prince Charming, there's no happily ever after for Romeo and Juliet. I wanna give Alex some advice, but I don't want him to think I'm just prying. When it comes to Liz, discussing anything about her can be a touchy subject. I feel I should tell him not to let his close relationship with Liz interfere with his current commitment with Sandra, but I imagine he might fly off the handle and accuse me of implying something that may or not be true. What should I do?
Do you and your brother shower together? Alex and Liz do.
Best Answers: Need help. My friend is overly close with his sister, ignoring his gf?
Happy | 9 days ago
If Sandra doesn't like the way Alex behaves, then as you rightly said, she should stop seeing Alex. This is a very, very important lesson for people to learn: you can't change other people or control their behavior. You can only decide whether you want to associate with them and how, and how YOU will behave. It would be very, very difficult to split up siblings. Part of this is that you can't control Sandra, but you can refuse to go along with her actions.
If you really want to help Alex and Liz, support and them and be there for them. They're facing enough bigotry and hate from people who have no business interfering in their relationship.
There is no rational moral reason for keeping laws or taboos against consensual incest. Personal disgust or religion is only a reason why one person would not want to personally engage in what I call consanguinamory, not why someone else shouldn't do it. An adult should be free to share love, sex, residence, and marriage with ANY consenting adults. Youthful experimentation between close relatives close in age is not uncommon, and there are more people than you'd think out there who are in lifelong healthy, happy relationships with a close relative. It isn't for everyone, but we're not all going to want to have each other's love lives, now are we? If someone thinks YOUR love life is disgusting, should you be thrown in prison?
Some people try to justify their prejudice against consanguineous sex and marriage by being part-time eugenicists and saying that such relationships inevitably lead to “mutant” or “deformed” babies. This argument can be refuted on several fronts. 1. Some consanguineous relationships involve only people of the same gender. 2. Not all mixed-gender relationships birth biological children. 3. Most births to consanguineous parents do not produce children with significant birth defects or other genetic problems; while births to other parents do sometimes have birth defects. 4. We don’t prevent other people from marrying or deny them their reproductive rights based on increased odds of passing along a genetic problem or inherited disease. It is true that in general, children born to consanguineous parents have an increased chance of these problems than those born to nonconsanguineous parents, but the odds are still minimal. Unless someone is willing to deny reproductive rights and medical privacy to others and force everyone to take genetic tests and bar carriers and the congenitally disabled and women over 35 from having children, then equal protection principles prevent this from being a justification to bar this freedom of association and freedom to marry.
Some say "Your sibling should not be your lover." That is not a reason. It begs the question. Many people have many relationships that have more than one aspect. Some women say their sister is their best friend. Why can’t their sister be a wife, too?
Some say “There is a power differential.” This applies least of all to siblings or cousins who are close in age, but even where the power differential exists, it is not a justification for denying this freedom to sex or to marry. There is a power differential in just about any relationship, sometimes an enormous power differential. To question if consent is truly possible in these cases is insulting and demeaning.
Some say “There are so many people outside of your family." There are plenty of people within one’s own race, too, but that is no reason to ban interracial marriage. So, this isn't a good reason either.
Some people who say it is wrong seem to have no problem with complete strangers having sex. So get over it, all of you who want your personal disgust to dictate the lives of others.
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We found more questions related to the topic: Age of the sister wives
Originally Answered: My best friend has been ignoring me what should I do?
I was in this situation not too long ago. I just started to hang out with new people, but I still talked to her. I would sit back and forth with each group of friends, but the new ones more. She later realized that she wasn't a good friend and understood why I didn't like her. We started to hang out more again and we are best friends, more like sisters. So we all talk to each other now, but yeah. So just hang out with your other friends, and if she is a true friend, she'll come back to you. If not, she isn't worth it. Hope this helps(:
Originally Answered: My best friend has been ignoring me what should I do?
Well I have had the exact same experience. What u wanna do is stuck with ur other friends and wait for her. U said u didn't like this other girl, well soon ur best friend will see it to, if you've been best friends for so long then u must have something in common so she will see it.
sure, I easily have 2 very close personalities with me. i do not want to assert them acquaintances. For me their status is above than an somewhat close buddy. until eventually date, i ought to no longer be waiting to locate a suitable note in any dictionary to be addressed for someone who's more effective than an wide buddy. in case you could help to discover such note then it will be my sturdy success.
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i think you are over reacting s little. so your friend and his sister are very close. so what? im very close with my brother too and we spend a lot of time togeher and sometimes we still sleep together in one bad because we are so close and its fun, he is a great brother. i guess that its the same for your friend, they are just very close. you shouldent do anything. its just coming right into their relationship.
plaes answer mine:
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Originally Answered: So this "friend" owes me a LOT of money, now ignoring me?
Don't post anything like that on his wall. That may make you feel good for a minute, but could get you in trouble if this ends up in court. Besides, if he has any brains, he may be able to edit it or block you entirely from posting to or seeing his FB at all.
If you want your money back, you are going to need to go to small claims court. Do you have an IOU, text message, email or anything stating what the terms of this loan were? Make sure to get as much documentation together to prove your case. Bank records, statements etc.
Going to war on FB isn't how an adult handles these things. And, really, do you think that is even going to rattle this person who has ignored you because they are avoiding paying you?